Do Not Undermine my Parental Authority!
November 15th, 2008
That’s what I was screeching yesterday, when I angrily admonished mrQ for not making littleQ wear a jacket. Alright, so it was an unseasonably warm 60+ degree mid-November day on Long Island, but come on, when Mommy tells the child to wear a jacket, Daddy should eagerly agree… right?
As the mother of a tot who at times seems just to be more of a “terrible two” year old than others, it’s very important to me that the guidelines of cooperative parenting be followed at least loosely. To me, that means that the we must have a completely open line of communication, and we each must not only be aware, but also respectful of the parenting decisions made by the other. I’m not exaggerating about the littleQ being a preeeetty terrible two-ster either. There are only two things that’ll keep this kid happy when he’s in a mood: cars and food. Sounds like a man to me.
I was so upset with him that I didn’t talk to him during the car ride to get dinner. But then today I gave in to littleQ’s tantrum in front of the Tonka display at Toys R Us. mrQ just clicked his tongue and shook his head at me, muttering something about being too indulgent and parental hypocrisy. Damn you toy trucks and cars, you are undermining my parental authority.
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I’m glad my husband finally learned not to disagree with me and vice versa when it comes to the kids. It’s very important to be on the same page or they’ll run all over you.
Cat @ 3 Kids and Uss last blog post..? Unique Charm & Angelina Mia Bambina Winners ?
There are as many ways to parent as there are kids, I guess.
We started with the ‘present a united front’ and then discovered that was the silliest idea ever with our daughter. Because it meant that when one parent made a bad, silly, or emotionally-charged call – the other one’s hands were tied.
When she started getting old enough to question it and seek independence, all that meant was that she thought we were both stupid or irrational and there was no use communicating with us, because we were too close minded to listen.
Our approach changed out of necessity… we found ourselves learning to say things like “Mommy? are you sure that was the right call? It is a little warm out. Is there a compromise we could reach?” and “Daddy? how about we see what the kidlet thinks a fair compromise would be… if you still decide X then we’ll go with that, but shall we consider her side?”
But each child must be dealt with how best works for him or her… So I sympathize with ToysRUs undermining your authori-tye!
Lucretia Pruitts last blog post..Blogging Guilt
@Lucretia – It’s definitely tough making sure we parent equally without stepping on each other toes.
@Cat – Yes! That’s exactly it.. kids know when there’s a crack in your resilience, and they will use their puppy dog eyes to get atcha